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Can February march? Im in desperate need of a 6-month vacation, twice a year. 100 Short Positive Affirmations: Keep Repeating Them I sometimes might be too much, but I am always enough. 214. no rich foods. Yes, of course, I am athletic, I surf the Internet every day. Being funny increase people's tendency to connect with you and talk to you. Life would be tragic if it werent funny too. 265. Start your day on a positive and lighter note with these funny daily affirmations and quotes to get you through. Good morning! 183. I believed in Santa Claus for 10 years. Bill Murray Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again? Maybe if we tell people the brain is an app, theyll start using it. Remember, no one can make you feel anything other than what YOU allow yourself. 161. 7. Affirmations can either be written down, spoken out loud, or visualized in the form of a conversation between money and you. What is the tallest building in the entire world? 91. My silence spoke a thousand words, but you never heard them. Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? You can also share them with your co-workers to put a smile on their faces. I just go normal from time to time. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars. 4. 226. 99 Positive Morning Affirmations You Can Use Daily Its what it is supposed to be, dont overthink and let it go. I am already great, and I am yet to reach my full potential. I may not know karate, but I know crazy and Im not afraid to use it. 94. 108. I may not know karate, but I know crazy and Im not afraid to use it. 25 Daily Mantras For Positive Thinking | Positive Creators Since not all of us are blessed with the ability to throw a joke the right way, we thought of helping you out by giving you these ridiculously short funny quotes. The most important thing to remember when using positive affirmations is that it is all about how you feel. I believed in Santa Claus for 10 years. It doesnt work if it is not open. ". Forget the butterflies, I feel the entire zoo in my stomach when Im with you. What do I do for a living? To thrive in life you need three bones. I dont need excuses, because I never mess things up. I walk in the direction of what feels good for my soul. Make it inspiring. Happy Birthday.". If at first, you dont succeed, so much for skydiving. Every weekend I do what I love most, absolutely nothing. We all have different and distinctive senses of humor thats what makes us such unique individuals. If you just want to keep reading, then heres some affirmations about the funny side of friendship. Gravitation cannot be held responsible for people falling in love. 92. 81. "When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.". It just plain forms. I love my computer because all my friends live inside it. 213. Dont let anything or anyone stop you from achieving what you truly aspire. 8. My room is like the Bermuda triangle, stuff goes in and is never seen again. - Irish Saying. If Im not there, I go to work. Robert Orben, 4. A mind is like a parachute. Whenever I am sad I go to my favorite place, the fridge. 231. And their purpose certainly isn't to minimize hard feelings. I dont cross oceans for people who wouldnt cross puddles for me. I dont need a hair stylist, my pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning. - Kyle Chandler. You can make friends and have good relationships if you believe in your sense of humor and fill your mind with funny and positive thoughts. Sometimes I am so freaking awesome, I blow my own mind. 26. It can get you out of a tight corner and people who lack a sense of humor cannot do. I am calm, patient and at peace. Heres a giant list of funny affirmations to help you relax your mind with a little humor when youre stressed. 126. I wonder, do we lazy people go to heaven or do they send someone to pick us up? Because so many kings and queens have been reigning there. 53. Im a work in progress without a completion date., See also: 120 Ultimate Best Quotes About Progress To Fuel Your Growth. 22. 245. I never apologize. If lying was a job some people would be billionaires. grateful. When and How to Let Them Know, How To Cheer Yourself Up When Feeling Down, 5 Things To Discuss With Your Partner Before Marriage, Funny Positive Affirmations For Self-Esteem, 50+ Powerful Positive Affirmations For Exams, 70+ Positive Affirmations For Teens From Parents. If the funny affirmations that Ive put together dont break your cool, then feel free to throw on a comedy special on Netflix or Youtube when you feel stressed. Quotes To Inspire You (MLK), 80 Life Gets Better Quotes To Brighten Your Day (Hope), 50 Bad Luck Quotes When You Feel Ill-Fated. I dont go crazy, I am crazy. Im old enough to know better, but young enough to do it anyway. 172. I nourish my body every day. Why did the school kids eat their homework? Funny Friday Quotes. I love my job only when Im on vacation. It has many of the same goals as affirmations, as theyre both associated with positivity and happiness. 23. Rome wasnt built in a day. Dont worry if plan A fails, there are 25 more letters in the alphabet. 279. Breasts dont have eyes. 66. Even on my worst day, Ive still got 24 hours., 6. 50 Christian Affirmations to Quiet Anxiety & Renew Your Mind - byDeze 156. What better way to do that than through your own self-talk? 2. The early bird catches the worm, eats more and dies sooner. Giving up on myself because of one setback is like slashing my other three tires because one is flat. - Christopher Reeve. 112. health is important. 82. It may feel useless but just get into it. Maybe if we tell people the brain is an app, theyll start using it. Milton Berle, 245. Today, I choose to put on my positive pants. On Mercury, a day lasts 1,408 hours. I tell you what always catches my eye. Your brain will only ever optimally respond to positive present tense affirmations such as " I am calm .". 230. Please do your own research before making any online purchase. 71. 3. Shoot for the moon. I would have appreciated exams if they had allowed our Pokemons and Ninjas. 178. 131. I have seen better days, but Ive also seen worse. Then perhaps youd find value in these articles on. 255. 3. 121. 186. Hes dreaming too. 78. 22. 74. 66. If only common sense were more common. 224. The only relationship I have is with my Wifi. Im going to stand outside, so if anybody asks for me, Im outstanding. I am constantly growing and improving. Funny affirmation quotes funny quotes about affirmation. My friends are like rocks, they help me through hard times. Papercut: A trees final moment of revenge. Life always offers you a second chance. 180. 116. Being funny seems to be taking less effort. Be careful when you follow the masses. I get up, dress up, and show up. They planet. ~ Bill Gates. 1. 3. God's promises are here to give you perfect peace, good news, renew your strength and reveal the will of God in your life. 64. The only relationship I have is with my Wifi. I just wanted you to know that somebody cares. 300+ Short Positive Quotes to Brighten Your Day - PsyCat Games Chris Rock, 256. Affirmations to wealth are a great way for you to organize your thoughts and develop a positive outlook. Make the statements about yourself and for yourself. People wait all week for Friday, all year for summer, all life for happiness. Whoever invented knock knock jokes should get a no bell prize. 120. Dont make me laugh, Im trying to be mad at you. And no, that's definitely not a bad thing! In the morning, I cant get up. You are good enough, smart enough, beautiful enough, and strong enough. I eat cake because its someones birthday somewhere today. I am Ananya, a professional speaker and I love motivating people and inspiring them to pursue their dreams. So, why not team them up? Stressed spelled backward is desserts. They shape our present and have an impact on our future. 74. "Once you choose hope, anything's possible.". In life, sometimes you just need to break the tension with a little humor. There comes a time when you have to stop crossing oceans for people who wouldnt even jump puddles for you., 13. Today, I look at my goals. If you want to catch a squirrel just climb a tree and act like a nut. You can think about your affirmations at work, while driving, when you practice yoga, and when you spend time with your . God heals, and the doctor takes the fees. This is a snap. Microchips. They log in. Life is 10% of what happens to you and 90% of how you react to it. It equates "weight loss" with thoughts like: I can. Sometimes I wish I was an octopus, so I could slap eight people at once. Stop playing with me., 6. Wouldnt exercise be more fun if calories screamed while you burned them? 273. I tell you what always catches my eye. Im not weird, Im just limited edition. Making everyone angry, piece of cake. You can stop driving me crazy, I can walk from here. But you're not as old as you're going to be.". I'm a peli-can! God heals, and the doctor takes the fees. avoid carbs. 10. 203. 179. 130. I attract the right people and repel the wrong ones. If youre hotter than me, then that means Im cooler than you. I am not only pretty but also pretty awesome, pretty smart, and pretty kind. 167. My goal this weekend is to move, just enough so people dont think Im dead. Robert A. Heinlein, 243. Im thinking like a proton, always positive., 9. Happiness is a choice. I know that I am stupid but when I look around me I feel a lot better. Albert King Use them as a tool to boost your self-esteem and productivity, as well as to overcome procrastination and complete all assigned tasks. As long as I have friends as weird as me, I have everything. Here are some tips on how to make the most of using these humorous affirmations: Laughter and affirmations are already powerful separately, so imagine what they can do for you when combined. 172. It is, therefore, safe to say that, sense of humor can help you become successful in whatever you choose to do in life. Revenge sounds so mean, thats why I prefer to call it Returning the favor.. Its okay if people dont like me. At night, I cant fall asleep. Your life is your message to the world. What do you call a bear with no teeth? "My funny vibes attract my happy tribe.". 87. 2. Common sense is like deodorant, those who need it the most never use it. 90. 93. Infographic: Why Do People Swipe Right (or Left) on Tinder. Sincerely, yourself. 105. Cindy from Marzahn. Maybe there are no excuses to be lazy, but Im still going to keep looking. 52. And a funny bone., 10. We have a connection. 138. It takes less time to do things right than to explain why you did it wrong. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, 9. Lottery: a tax on people who are bad at math. - Unknown. Related Post: 201 Awesome Short Inspirational Quotes About Life. I am on a seafood diet. Dear universe, Im totally open to all of the amazing things coming my way., See also: 120 Best Spiritual Universe Quotes To Contemplate Life. Positive affirmations kind of set the way how your day will flow. Robert A. Heinlein 58. It doesn't make sense to dwell on things you can't do anything about. Really? Before using these amusing affirmations, you should believe in your sense of humor.

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